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Robert Mueller Likely Knows How the Trump Russia Investigation Ends Print
Wednesday, 02 May 2018 13:36

Graff writes: "It seems clear that Mueller might actually be relatively close to wrapping up the investigation."

Mueller's proposed questions are presumably the starting point for what would then be increasingly detailed follow-ups, backed up by specific emails, documents, telephone records, and other files Mueller's team and FBI investigators have accumulated in an investigation stretching back more than two years. (photo: Ron Sachs/AP)
Mueller's proposed questions are presumably the starting point for what would then be increasingly detailed follow-ups, backed up by specific emails, documents, telephone records, and other files Mueller's team and FBI investigators have accumulated in an investigation stretching back more than two years. (photo: Ron Sachs/AP)


Robert Mueller Likely Knows How the Trump Russia Investigation Ends

By Garrett M. Graff, Wired

02 May 18

 

he beginning of May marks the longest period of public silence from special counsel Robert Mueller’s team since his first charges last October—more than two months without any new plea deals, fresh indictments, or publicly “flipped” witnesses.

At the same time, though, it’s been a period of aggressive moves that continue to illustrate an investigation that is far from complete, including the raid by federal prosecutors on Trump lawyer Michael Cohen’s office, court evidence that shows Mueller’s team successfully sought permission to expand the scope of the probe, the release of former FBI director James Comey’s memos documenting his interactions with the president, continual hints that the special counsel is probing the UAE, the odd meeting by Blackwater founder Erik Prince in the Seychelles, and numerous other aspects of the complex, multi-part investigation.

Recent weeks have also seen President Trump tweeting regularly about the investigation and the capital W, capital H “Witch Hunt,” and in his train wreck of a phone interview with Fox & Friends last week, he hinted that his patience is wearing thin, referring to “our Justice Department, which I try and stay away from, but at some point I won't.”

“I’ve taken the position—and I don’t have to take this position and maybe I’ll change—that I will not be involved with the Justice Department. I will wait until this is over. It's a total, it's all lies and it’s a horrible thing that’s going on, a horrible thing,” he said. “They have a witch hunt against the President of the United States going on.”

Then, last night, the final hours of April held one final surprise: The New York Times published a list of questions that, according to Donald Trump’s legal team, Mueller’s office wants to ask the president. The more than four dozen questions span a spectrum from the Steele dossier to suspicious, Russia-friendly changes to the GOP’s party platform during the 2016 Cleveland convention, but most of the questions focus on the president’s own statements and reactions to various steps of the investigation, and his interactions with three key figures: former national security adviser Mike Flynn, attorney general Jeff Sessions, and Comey.

Donald Trump himself tweeted about the questions early Tuesday, saying it was a “disgrace” that they leaked, but the Times story sources the leak to people on Trump’s side; Mueller’s team continues to operate almost entirely leak-free. It’s also hard to read the leaks as anything other than an attempt to bring public pressure on Trump to refuse an interview with Mueller’s team. (According to media reports, Trump has been keen to sit down with Mueller, but his legal team has advised against it.)

Mueller’s proposed questions are primarily high-level—presumably the starting point for what would then be increasingly detailed follow-ups, backed up by specific emails, documents, telephone records, and other files Mueller’s team and FBI investigators have accumulated in an investigation stretching back more than two years. While the initial 49 questions are intriguing on their own, they primarily line up with what’s publicly known about the investigation so far. There’s nothing out of left field. Thus, the real mystery is the follow-ups: Why, precisely, is Mueller interested?

Taken as a whole, the leaked questions help shape and underscore some key takeaways:

1. Mueller always knows more than we think. Every single indictment has been deeper, broader, and more detailed than anyone anticipated. This “misunderestimating” of what Mueller knows has been true of both the public and media reports, and of his witnesses and targets: Both Rick Gates and Alex van der Zwaan were caught in lies by Mueller’s team, who have known far more specific information than their targets first realized. Presumably, Mueller’s questions to Trump are informed by even more evidence that we haven’t seen.

2. Mueller is building a bulletproof case. Paul Manafort spent the spring trying to argue that Mueller was a loose cannon, a reckless, out-of-control prosecutor straying far beyond his assignment. His court case, though, proved just the opposite: The release this spring in court of a previously classified memo by Rod Rosenstein makes clear just how cautiously and conservatively Mueller is proceeding legally. One of the key members of Mueller’s team, Michael Dreeben, specializes in looking down the road at potential legal pitfalls and how cases might appear not just at initial trials but in later appellate courts. And Dreeban’s work has paid obvious dividends: After reviewing the evidence in Manafort’s effort to dismiss the charges against him and Mueller’s highly detailed 282-page rebuttal, Judge Amy Berman Jackson told Manafort’s lawyers, “I don’t really understand what is left of your case.”

3. There are more loose threads than ever. Perhaps the most troubling conclusion after reading Mueller’s proposed questions is just how many questions exist about the behavior and motivations of the President of the United States during his first year in office. The 49 questions lay out just how much remains unanswered and unknown, publicly at least, nearly a year into Mueller’s special counsel work. It’s hard to tell from the questions alone which ones represent the most possible jeopardy for the president, but when matched against the five core areas of Mueller’s investigation, it’s clear that Mueller wants to talk with President Trump about nearly all of them, from obstruction of justice to the Trump Organization’s business deals in Russia to the 2016 Trump campaign’s involvement with various Russian officials. Add in the full breadth of the investigation, from New York taxi medallions to Virginia rug stores, and the “supporting players”—including Erik Prince, Jeff Sessions, Jared Kushner, Tony Podesta, Carter Page, Sergey Kislyak, Sergey Gorkov, Michael Cohen, Roger Stone, as well as the hackers of Fancy Bear and Cozy Bear—and it’s clear that this is no made-up “witch hunt.” There are likely more indictments yet to come.

4. We still don’t know the biggest, most important evidence. There’s an ever-growing pile of evidence that exists that hasn’t become public yet. That includes, obviously, the evidence that George Papadopoulos, Michael Flynn, and Rick Gates all traded to Mueller for their plea deals over the last seven months. Presumably, Mueller considers each defendant’s testimony worthy of trading months—and even years—off of a potential prison sentence, so it seems significant that more than seven months after Mueller “flipped” Papadopoulos, we still haven’t seen a single iota of the evidence he presumably provided to the investigation.

5. Mueller likely already knows how this story ends. Add up the four above points and it seems clear that Mueller might actually be relatively close to wrapping up the investigation. Given that the FBI raid on Michael Cohen’s office, stemming from an investigation by federal prosecutors from the Southern District of New York, was sure to provoke a reaction from President Trump—the investigative equivalent of kicking a hornet’s nest—it seems likely that Mueller and deputy attorney general Rod Rosenstein, who approved the raid, understood that one or both of them might be fired by the president in its wake. It seems likely that before they took such a provocative step on the case that they could see their way through to the investigation's end.


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Time's Up for Harvey Weinstein Print
Written by <a href="index.php?option=com_comprofiler&task=userProfile&user=38548"><span class="small">Mark Joseph Stern, Slate</span></a>   
Wednesday, 02 May 2018 13:28

Stern writes: "Ashley Judd is suing Weinstein under California law for four separate but related claims."

Ashley Judd and Harvey Weinstein. (photo: Getty)
Ashley Judd and Harvey Weinstein. (photo: Getty)


Time's Up for Harvey Weinstein

By Mark Joseph Stern, Slate

02 May 18


Why Ashley Judd’s lawsuit against the film executive is such a brilliant gambit.

n Monday, Ashley Judd sued disgraced Hollywood mogul Harvey Weinstein for his grotesque behavior toward her more than two decades ago. Although Judd’s expertly crafted suit centers around Weinstein’s alleged efforts to assault her in a hotel room, it is not exclusively about his purported sexual misconduct. Instead, the complaint, filed by renowned Gibson Dunn attorney Theodore Boutrous, deftly weaves that episode into a compelling theory of economic wrongdoing, accusing Weinstein of attempting to harm her career after she evaded his sexual predation.

Plenty of women have been professionally disadvantaged by sexist, exploitative men. But far too few are able to sue in court given the difficulty of producing clear and convincing evidence. Luckily for Judd, she has witnesses to Weinstein’s reported wrongdoing. And her extremely plausible accusations could cost her alleged tormentor millions in damages.

The events at the heart of Judd’s lawsuit occurred in late 1996 or early 1997, when Weinstein—then part owner of the production company Miramax—was at the height of his power. The film executive invited Judd, whose career was just getting off the ground, to the Peninsula Hotel in Los Angeles to discuss possible film roles. When she arrived, Judd was directed to Weinstein’s private hotel room, where he allegedly greeted her in a bathrobe, alone. According to the lawsuit, he then asked if he could give her a massage. She declined. He then allegedly asked her to watch him shower. Once again, she declined. Feeling “cornered,” Judd “engaged in a mock bargain,” joking that he could only “touch her” after she won an Oscar for one of his movies. “When you get nominated,” Weinstein insisted. “No, when I win,” Judd pushed back. She then “fled the scene.”

Judd ran to the lobby, where her father was waiting. He told her it looked like something “devastating” had happened to her, and she told him the story. Soon after, she told her mother as well. Her suit alleges that Weinstein continued “to lord that traumatic moment” over her, telling her at public events that she should “remember their agreement.”

As these grotesque reminders suggest, Weinstein had not forgotten Judd’s refusal to comply with his antagonistic sexual demands. About a year later, after Judd had starred in the hit film Kiss the Girls, Peter Jackson and his partner Fran Walsh invited her to a private meeting. They showed Judd detailed plans for their upcoming trilogy, The Lord of the Rings, and asked which of two potential roles she would prefer to play, indicating their clear intent to cast her. After conferring with Viggo Mortensen, who was also asked to star in the movies, Judd decided to accept the offer.

But there was a hitch: At that point, Miramax held the rights to the Lord of the Rings films. When Jackson and Walsh expressed their enthusiasm for casting Judd, Weinstein and his associates told them that Judd was “a nightmare to work with” and should be avoided “at all costs.” They also asserted that Miramax had “bad experiences” with Judd in the past. This statement appears to be demonstrably false: Judd had previously acted in exactly one Miramax film, Smoke, appearing in a small role that required just two days of shooting; her work on the film spurred no known complaints. Indeed, Miramax would go on to cast Judd in two future movies, undercutting the studio’s earlier complaint about her professionalism. (By that point, Judd was a bankable star, no longer a relative newcomer whose professional development could be thwarted with a rumor.)

Eventually, New Line bought the rights to The Lord of the Rings from Miramax. But Jackson and Walsh still decided not to cast Judd—expressly because, Jackson later recalled, they believed Weinstein’s claim about her poor behavior. “At the time,” Jackson said in December 2017, “we had no reason to question what [Miramax] was telling us—but in hindsight, I realize that this was very likely the Miramax smear campaign in full swing.” The director suspected that “we were fed false information” about Judd and, “as a direct result,” her name was removed from the films’ casting list.

The Lord of the Rings went on to gross $2.5 billion while winning multiple Oscars. Its successor trilogy, The Hobbit, was also a box-office smash, though Jackson did not consider Judd for any roles for the same reason he excluded her from the earlier films. Her career still blossomed, but not to the extent that it might have had she starred in the massively popular trilogy.

As a result of these events, Judd is suing Weinstein under California law for four separate but related claims. First, she’s suing him for slander, accusing Weinstein of maliciously spreading false information about her professionalism. She’s also suing him for engaging in “sexual harassment in professional relationships” by making unwelcome sexual advances then attempting to stymie her career when she resisted them. Judd could probably collect substantial damages from these claims alone.

But Judd’s complaint doesn’t stop with the low-hanging fruit. It also alleges “intentional interference with prospective economic advantage”—in effect, wrongfully depriving her of economic benefit by intentionally torpedoing her professional relationship with Jackson. And it accuses Weinstein of engaging in fraudulent business acts by defaming Judd and retaliating against her in an effort to derail her participation in The Lord of the Rings.

These last two claims are the real heart of the lawsuit. They open up Weinstein to immense damages—both punitive damages and restitution for Judd’s lost business opportunities. Judd is suing Weinstein to recover the money she should have received for starring in Jackson’s trilogy, money she was denied on account of Weinstein’s alleged malign interference. Such claims are typically difficult if not impossible to prove, because the victim rarely has solid evidence that her abuser’s misconduct is the direct cause of her missed economic opportunities. Here, however, Jackson has been eager to go on the record to explain that it was Weinstein’s words alone that informed his decision not to cast Judd for his trilogy. His candor presents an opportunity for the actress to collect significantly more restitution than she would otherwise.

Judd, of course, is already a millionaire, and the primary goal of this litigation isn’t to make her whole financially. Rather, it’s designed to win a moral and political victory. The actress has said that she will donate damages to Time’s Up, which has already raised $20 million for its legal defense fund to help victims who might not have Ted Boutrous on speed dial. Judd’s lawsuit is distinct from the kind of litigation funded by Time’s Up; few other victims will have such unambiguous evidence, famous allies, or massive damages. Judd, for her part, has capitalized on those advantages in an attempt to hold Weinstein accountable. That is her privilege and prerogative, and it is Weinstein’s richly deserved misfortune.


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FOCUS: Will Donald Trump Plead the Fifth or Be Subpoenaed? Print
Wednesday, 02 May 2018 10:39

Toobin writes: "Message to President Trump: Please take the Fifth. That appears to be the subtext of the nearly fifty questions, leaked to the press on Monday, that Robert Mueller, the special counsel, reportedly wants to ask the President."

For Donald Trump, there are no good - that is, non-incriminating - answers to the special counsel's questions. (photo: Doug Mills/NYT)
For Donald Trump, there are no good - that is, non-incriminating - answers to the special counsel's questions. (photo: Doug Mills/NYT)


Will Donald Trump Plead the Fifth or Be Subpoenaed?

By Jeffrey Toobin, The New Yorker

02 May 18

 

essage to President Trump: Please take the Fifth.

That appears to be the subtext of the nearly fifty questions, leaked to the press on Monday, that Robert Mueller, the special counsel, reportedly wants to ask the President. The questions, revealed in yet another scoop by the Times’ Michael S. Schmidt, do not appear to be word-for-word recitations of what the prosecutor will ask. Rather, they appear to be summaries of those questions, prepared by the President’s lawyers. But the gist is clear. Mueller seems to suspect that Donald Trump orchestrated an obstruction of justice in order to forestall the F.B.I.’s investigation of his campaign’s possible ties to Russia. Mueller also seems to have questions about the legality of the contacts between people affiliated with the campaign and Russians in the first place.

It’s usually a fool’s game to guess who leaked something, and why; the identity and the motives of journalists’ sources are difficult to fathom, even to the leaker and the leakee. But the message, intentional or not, of these questions is clear: there is no way that Trump should put himself in the position of answering them.

To date, Trump’s public comments about the Mueller investigation have generally fallen into two categories. First, he has repeatedly denounced Mueller’s inquiry as a witch hunt. Second, he has insisted, over and over again, that there was no collusion between his campaign and Russia. He has almost never addressed the specifics of the investigation, and when he has (as Mueller’s questions recognize) he has landed himself in trouble. For example, a central part of a possible obstruction case against Trump involves his decision to fire James Comey, the director of the F.B.I., in May of last year. In the immediate aftermath, the White House put out the explanation that Comey was fired for mishandling the investigation of Hillary Clinton’s e-mails during the 2016 campaign. But, in the following days, Trump made comments to Lester Holt, of NBC News, and to a group of Russian diplomats, in the Oval Office, to the effect that the firing was designed to forestall the Russia investigation—and thus constitutes a possible obstruction of justice.

The leaked questions try to get Trump to explain this contradiction. “What did you mean in your interview with Lester Holt about Mr. Comey and Russia?” one asks. “What did you mean when you told Russian diplomats on May 10, 2017, that firing Mr. Comey had taken the pressure off?” another asks. For Trump, there are no good—that is, non-incriminating—answers to these questions. Either the original explanation for the Comey firing was false, or else Trump was lying when he gave the second one. Or, given his lack of self-discipline, he may come up with yet another contradictory explanation. Trump would greet many of Mueller’s questions with his characteristic filibusters, but this practice has limited utility in the face of a disciplined questioner. The President would surely try to run out the clock on an interrogation of limited duration—which his lawyers would insist on—but Mueller and his team would probably have some success in obtaining at least some categorical answers from him. And Trump’s absence of good options for answering questions about the reasons for Comey’s firing would recur in many of the areas of Mueller’s interest.

Any sane lawyer would try at all costs to avoid putting a client in this kind of position. But Trump’s legal team has limited options. In public, Trump and his lawyers have presented the matter of whether he answers Mueller’s questions as one of the President’s choosing. It is not. If negotiations over a voluntary interview break down, Mueller will surely issue a subpoena for the President’s testimony. Trump could fight the issue in court, but Supreme Court precedent, from the Nixon and Clinton eras, suggests that Trump would fail to quash a subpoena for his testimony. The courts would demand that Trump testify. What, then, would Trump’s options be?

There are just two. He could testify, and hope that his answers land him in less trouble than he already faces. Or he could take the Fifth—that is, refuse to answer on the grounds that the answers might incriminate him. This, to be sure, is perilous political ground. The public tends to regard taking the Fifth as an admission of guilt. And Trump himself, in a question surely to be endlessly cited, has said, “If you are innocent, why are you taking the Fifth?” But he has apparently already taken the Fifth in the course of his complex history of civil litigation. And he could present taking the Fifth now as a form of protest against an illegitimate and unfair investigation—a view already shared by a substantial portion of Republicans across the country.

If he took the Fifth, Trump would surely endure a few days of bad press, and his assertion of his rights would become an indelible part of his record as President. But would his approval rating, which has rarely strayed more than a few points north or south of forty per cent, really be hurt? Would his supporters desert him? I doubt it. Opinions about Trump, especially in connection with the Russia investigation, seem fixed and immobile. Mueller’s detailed and fraught questions suggest that the risk in answering them far outweighs the risk of just saying no.


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Netanyahu: Don't Look Here Where We're Shooting Children, Look Over There at Iran Print
Wednesday, 02 May 2018 08:36

Cole writes: "Israeli Prime Minister Binyamin Netanyahu, a notorious warmonger, serial liar and supremacist racialist who used to lead the closest thing Israel has to a fascist party until parties even more extreme got elected to parliament, is attempting to bamboozle the clueless Trump into getting on a war footing with Iran."

Prime Minister Benjamin Netanyahu with senior Israeli Defense Forces commanders near Gaza in 2014. (photo: Israel government photo)
Prime Minister Benjamin Netanyahu with senior Israeli Defense Forces commanders near Gaza in 2014. (photo: Israel government photo)


Netanyahu: Don't Look Here Where We're Shooting Children, Look Over There at Iran

By Juan Cole, Informed Comment

02 May 18

 

sraeli Prime Minister Binyamin Netanyahu, a notorious warmonger, serial liar and supremacist racialist who used to lead the closest thing Israel has to a fascist party until parties even more extreme got elected to parliament, is attempting to bamboozle the clueless Trump into getting on a war footing with Iran.

Netanyahu’s breathless announcement that there was a potential weapons aspect to Iran’s nuclear enrichment program has been known for a decade and a half.

Netanyahu even seems to have provoked the White House to issue a communique falsely stating that Iran has a weapons program presently, which it promptly had to retract. The incident is so scary because it shows how easy it is to manipulate the erratic Trump and his not-ready-for-prime-time staff. That sort of thing, David Frum said on Twitter, can cause a war. And he should know.

But the retraction is incorrect, as well. Iran in the distant past had done some things that would be helpful if it had launched a full blown weapons program. It never did launch such a program.

Netanyahu instanced no evidence at all that Iran is out of compliance with the 2015 deal, and UN inspectors continually have affirmed that Tehran *is* in compliance. His allegation that Iran’s recent missiles are designed to be fitted with warheads is simply false.

So why try to put Iran on the front burner of American war-making? It is a desperate attempt on Netanyahu’s part to divert world attention from the ongoing Israeli Apartheid discrimination against the stateless Palestinians, which it militarily occupies (directly with jackboots and colonial settlers on the West Bank, indirectly with military encirclement and the sniping of innocent protesters in Gaza).

In recent weeks, Israeli snipers have used live ammunition to kill some 40 and wound hundreds of Palestinians who were unarmed and peacefully protesting their imprisonment in the Gaza Strip (70% of their families were kicked out of their homes in Israel and now live in squalid refugee camps while European Israelis took over their houses and farmland and are living it up). The sniping victims have including children, journalists, demonstrators distant from the Israeli confinement fence, and worshipers at prayer with the mention of God on their lips. Shooting unarmed people who pose no threat is a war crime, and doing it systematically amounts to a crime against humanity. So too is the crime of Apartheid described in the Statute of Rome as a “crime against humanity,” and Israel manifestly and robustly practices Apartheid against the Palestinians under its military heel.

The 2015 Joint Comprehensive Plan of Action (JCPOA) on Iran’s civilian nuclear enrichment program (to make fuel for reactors generating electricity) was designed to prevent Iran from weaponizing the program.

All nuclear enrichment via centrifuges is potentially dual use. Uranium can be enriched to 5% for reactor fuel, but if scientists keep feeding it through the centrifuges they can enrich it to 95% for a bomb. The Iran deal was designed to keep Iran from making high enriched uranium (HEU).

Iran accepted spot inspections by the International Atomic Energy Agency. No country under active inspections has ever developed a nuclear weapon.

Iran vastly reduced the number of centrifuges it has, which means it would take at least a year or even years to make HEU, even if it could do so without the inspectors detecting the signature at the site, which it cannot.

Iran discontinued and bricked in its planned heavy water reactor at Arak. Fissile material builds up on the rods in a heavy water reactor much faster than on a light water reactor, and so the heavy water ones can theoretically aid in making a bomb. Iran no longer even has a plan for a heavy water reactor.

Iran destroyed its stockpile of uranium enriched to 19.5% for its medical reactor. It has no enriched uranium higher than 5%, useful for its three reactors at Bushehr. Iran benefits from nuclear energy because it burns oil for electricity generation, cutting into the money it could make from instead selling it on the open market.

South Korea, Japan and France all use nuclear reactors for electricity generation just as Iran is starting to. France enriches uranium both for that purpose and to make nuclear weapons. If you don’t think Japan could construct a bomb in three weeks if it wanted to, you don’t know Japanese technology (they have a big stockpile of plutonium).

So Netanyahu and the American Right should have sighed in relief, right? Remember, Netanyahu has several hundred actual real nuclear bombs that it could drop on Iran, and Iran has bupkes. Likewise the US is bristling with nuclear warheads. Iran has some old F4 jets Nixon gave them.

In 2007, the National Intelligence Estimate of the CIA assessed that Iran did some experiments with military significance in 2003 but then halted them ever after. The 2011 NIE repeated the conclusion that Iran did not have a weapons program at that time and had not decided to pursue one.

Our sloppy and sometimes propagandistic press keeps talking about Iran’s “nuclear weapons program,” but it is a unicorn. No such thing has ever existed per se, though the experiments and programs Iran pursued as part of its civilian energy program always had potential weapons implications, and Iranian scientists did perform some occasional experiments that might have had weapons purposes.

Because nuclear enrichment is dual use, Iran until 2015 always had the option of going for broke and pursuing a bomb, using know-how gained from the civilian program. That is all the CIA was saying. It was also saying that no such decision had been taken, a conclusion echoed by Israeli politicians like Ehud Barak and by Israeli intelligence.

But the JCPOA forestalled any such decision. Iran could only make a bomb now by kicking out the inspectors and manufacturing thousands of centrifuges, in other words by putting up a huge neon sign saying “I am making a nuclear bomb here.”

Iran’s nuclear enrichment program has also always probably been intended to have deterrent effects against anyone thinking of doing to the country what Bush did to Iraq. I.e. if it was clear someone was planning to invade, Iran could in fact go for broke and try to defend itself.

Since the US right wing and the government of Israel would very much like to see Iran invaded and its government overthrown, and its legs broken, this nuclear latency or the Japan option is an annoyance they would like to remove. It is easier to execute someone if you disarm him first.

But Iran of course is already substantially disarmed, voluntarily. What is going on now is an attempt to pull the wool over people’s eyes about that and to con them into spending $6 trillion on another ruinous Middle East conflict.

That will keep everybody busy while Netanyahu finally succeeds in ethnically cleansing what is left of the Palestinians, his ulterior ultimate goal.


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NRA Gun Ban During Pence's Speech Leaves Him Vulnerable to Bear Attack, DeVos Warns Print
Written by <a href="index.php?option=com_comprofiler&task=userProfile&user=9160"><span class="small">Andy Borowitz, The New Yorker</span></a>   
Tuesday, 01 May 2018 13:29

Borowitz writes: "Speaking to reporters at the Education Department, DeVos said that she was 'deeply concerned' that the N.R.A. was underestimating the danger posed to Pence by 'the savagery of one rogue bear.'"

Vice President Mike Pence. (photo: Brendon Thorne/Getty)
Vice President Mike Pence. (photo: Brendon Thorne/Getty)


NRA Gun Ban During Pence's Speech Leaves Him Vulnerable to Bear Attack, DeVos Warns

By Andy Borowitz, The New Yorker

01 May 18

 

The article below is satire. Andy Borowitz is an American comedian and New York Times-bestselling author who satirizes the news for his column, "The Borowitz Report."


he National Rifle Association’s decision to ban guns during Mike Pence’s speech at its annual meeting in Dallas this week “leaves him totally vulnerable to a bear attack,” the Secretary of Education, Betsy DeVos, warned on Monday.

Speaking to reporters at the Education Department, DeVos said that she was “deeply concerned” that the N.R.A. was underestimating the danger posed to Pence by “the savagery of one rogue bear.”

“All it would take is one angry bear to ruin what otherwise promises to be a really nice gun event,” she said.

She added that, after contacting the N.R.A. leadership, she was alarmed to discover that there would be no bear detectors at the entrance to the Dallas venue.

“A bear can simply waltz in there,” she said, shaking her head. “This is madness.”

DeVos urged the gun organization to rethink its plan and insure that every member of the audience for Pence’s speech is fully armed.

“If there are no guns, that is sending a very dangerous message to bears,” she said.


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