Grannies Decline to Be Starved

By Charles Pierce, Esquire

25 September 12

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MaAJoibNWtk

hat nice young Ryan boy dropped by the AARP convention on Friday to assure the various grannies that his zombie-eyes were not really planning to starve them. The grannies seemed to be less than convinced that zombie-eyed granny-starvers indeed do not intend to starve grannies.

Another tough response from the crowd came as Ryan attacked Obama as a cynical failure for not negotiating changes to Social Security cuts with Republicans. "Time and again the president has ducked the tough issues," Ryan said. "He put his own job security over your retirement security. Of course he said he would be willing to work with Republicans, but he has not moved an inch closer to common ground. When it comes to bipartisanship, it's easy to talk the talk but there is only one man running for president this year who has actually walked the walk: that man is Mitt Romney."

(A brief pause here. Listen closely. That massive rumbling you hear is the Shade Of LBJ after hearing the likes of the zombie-eyed granny-starver's talking about the threat to "both sides of LBJ's pledge." If the earth splits and crows doth sit upon the capitol any time soon, you'll know why.)

The walk that Willard Romney has walked, of course, is his health-care plan in Massachusetts, which I guarantee you, Paul Ryan would not have voted for had he been in the state legislature here. So, no, the grannies were not convinced. He is a well-dressed young man, though, isn't he? And such lovely diction.

See Also: AARP Members Call Ryan a Liar