Instead of having sex, sex HAS us! More and more Viagra and Cialis, and now a female version of these drugs, takes over. We are decieved into believing that a performance of sexuality is intimacy instead of risking to emotionally FEEL anything at all. What we replace our emotions with, is the visual, material, qualifications of our partners. We base their ratings on how they measure up to celebrities, etc.

If we all experienced true intimacy instead of performance "intimacy", we would all be fulfilled and loving and would be able to communicate with each other better. Instead we choose having to be falsely "civil" with only the sheerest veneer of political correctness masking our exponentially growing internal anger. Sexual performances, at best, distract us for a short time from previous quantifications of how we are doing in life, i.e., how much material "goods", how many "toys" we have managed to posses. When we collect these beyond what we absolutely need for basic survival, in reality, these goods, "toys" collect and possess us! What we think we "need" for security,(namely anything beyond our simplest PRESENT survival needs) we pay for in terms of denying ourselves limitless intimacy and limitless love.

There is a limitless power that we all have to feel emotions, especially love. This is so frightening to all of us, that we settle for sexual quantifications, qualifications, limitations. We all have this power, this ability, this potential to transcend performances of false intimacy by risking to be spontaneous. However before WE CAN be spontaneous, we first must free ourselves from what is our IMAGINED duty to be what "others" want us to be. We need to first be true to ourselves.

This requires unloading or de-packing all of our aquired, assumed identities and choosing new identities and new priorities. Once we are adults, we need to become mature adults who have internalized unique priorities instead of of in addition to pleasing parents, teachers (in loco parentis). Our extended parental subsitutes become more and more abstract as we get older. ie., our bosses, our government, external and internal authorities and constructed, abstract morality, etc. We need to risk giving "birth" to our own emotionally valid self. Then we need to develop that valid self INTERNALLY so that emotional support comes from our own MORALITY LIMITLESSNESS.

Only you, the real you, the authentic you, knows intuitively and intuitionally what is morally right and what is morally wrong for YOU, because only you have EXPERIENCED you, and only you can know and feel when you have acted from a position that is justified, and when you have acted from a position of unjustified defensiveness. Others can, at best only PRACTICE telling you what is moral and what is immoral. What others communicate about the morality of others is a biased judgement. If we want to free ourselves to have real intimacy, we first must risk having ourselves!

This is my New Year's, 2012 New Memories, "gift" to you, my readers: that there IS a YOU to BE limitless!