Borowitz writes: "Raising the ante in his ongoing battle with the aqueous substance, Georgia's governor, Brian Kemp, has declared water 'a gateway drug that leads to voting.'"
Georgia's governor, Brian Kemp. (photo: Nathan Posner/Shutterstock)
Georgia Governor Declares Water a Gateway Drug That Leads to Voting
29 March 21
The article below is satire. Andy Borowitz is an American comedian and New York Times-bestselling author who satirizes the news for his column, "The Borowitz Report." 
aising the ante in his ongoing battle with the aqueous substance, Georgia’s governor, Brian Kemp, has declared water “a gateway drug that leads to voting.”
“We’ve consulted a lot of studies on this,” he said. “People are much more likely to vote if they are under the influence of water.”
The governor said that he was considering a number of measures to address water addiction, including stiffer penalties for voting while quenching.
In his starkest warning, Kemp told those who traffic in the banned liquid, “We’re coming after you,” and promised prison time for anyone combining hydrogen and oxygen in illegal water labs.
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