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Borowitz writes: "Donald J. Trump attempted to further distance himself from a racist chant shouted at a North Carolina campaign rally earlier this week by denying that he had attended the rally."

Supporters of President Donald Trump at a rally in Greenville, N.C., on Wednesday. (photo: Zach Gibson/Getty Images)
Supporters of President Donald Trump at a rally in Greenville, N.C., on Wednesday. (photo: Zach Gibson/Getty Images)


Trump Denies Being at North Carolina Rally

By Andy Borowitz, The New Yorker

20 July 19

 

The article below is satire. Andy Borowitz is an American comedian and New York Times-bestselling author who satirizes the news for his column, "The Borowitz Report."


onald J. Trump attempted to further distance himself from a racist chant shouted at a North Carolina campaign rally earlier this week by denying that he had attended the rally.

“I wasn’t there,” Trump told reporters at the White House on Friday. “If I had been there, you can be sure I would have done everything I could to stop them from chanting.”

Trump said that he was furious that thousands of people had apparently assembled in North Carolina to chant racist things when he was nowhere near the rally and thus totally incapable of intervening.

“It’s the kind of thing I would have been disgusted by if I had been there to hear it,” he said. “Unfortunately, I wasn’t there.”

On Capitol Hill, Senator Lindsey Graham lashed out at reporters for persistently claiming that Trump had, in fact, attended the rally. “If he says he wasn’t there, then, damn it, he wasn’t there,” a visibly furious Graham said. “How do you people sleep at night?”

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+26 # DongiC 2019-07-20 14:24
Upon persistent questioning by the press, Trump admitted that while he was not present in North Carolina, his double, a remarkable look-alike, may have, in fact, been there. However, Trump emphasized that this gentleman never would have stooped so low as the Squad alleges because he loves his country. Unlike those slimy Democrats from the North who we know all hate it so. Why don't they just go back where they came from and leave patriotic voters, like my base, in charge? Then, Trump roared, we could make America great again.
 
 
+29 # MikeAF48 2019-07-20 17:58
I know he was in bed with a 400 pound woman.
 
 
+3 # DongiC 2019-07-20 22:34
This is really sweet. Good job, MikeAF48.
 
 
+3 # kgrad 2019-07-21 07:00
Quoting MikeAF48:
I know he was in bed with a 400 pound woman.


...and how do you know this? [tongue in cheek question]
 
 
+3 # LionMousePudding 2019-07-21 12:34
Please do not fat shame. Thank you.
 
 
+6 # Carol R 2019-07-21 04:25
Character is doing the right thing when nobody's looking. There are too many people who think that the only thing that's right is to get by, and the only thing that's wrong is to get caught. ~J.C. Watts
 
 
+5 # hectormaria 2019-07-21 08:03
People, racism is still doing its dastardly deeds; remember, only racists support Trump's racism; therefore, if you are in denial about where you stand, ask yourself the question: Do I support Trump?
 
 
+5 # WorkingClass 2019-07-21 12:19
And being nothing else if not loyal the Trump followers who attended the rally swear the President didn't attend.
 
 
+4 # revhen 2019-07-21 14:45
Homosexuality is not the only issue that has recently come out of the closet. In response to Trump's rants, expression and exercise of racism has become acceptable.
 

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