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Borowitz writes: "In an urgent memo to the field of G.O.P. Presidential candidates, the Republican National Committee chairman, Reince Priebus, praised them for their relentless personal attacks on Hillary Clinton, but warned that their hatred for the former Secretary of State might be 'peaking too early.'"

Hillary Clinton. (photo: Andrew Burton/Getty)
Hillary Clinton. (photo: Andrew Burton/Getty)


GOP Chairman Warns Against Hatred for Hillary Peaking Too Soon

By Andy Borowitz, The New Yorker

24 April 15

 

The article below is satire. Andy Borowitz is an American comedian and New York Times-bestselling author who satirizes the news for his column, "The Borowitz Report."


n an urgent memo to the field of G.O.P. Presidential candidates, the Republican National Committee chairman, Reince Priebus, praised them for their relentless personal attacks on Hillary Clinton, but warned that their hatred for the former Secretary of State might be “peaking too early.”

Priebus called the candidates’ ongoing evisceration of Clinton “magnificent,” but expressed his concern that “no human beings, even an impressive group like yourselves, could possibly sustain such a high intensity of throbbing hatred for an entire year and a half.”

“Remember, this is a marathon, not a sprint,” he wrote. “You need to leave some hate in the tank.”

In the conclusion of his memo, Priebus advised the candidates to take an occasional day off from hating Clinton so that they could “return to despising her with renewed freshness and vigor.”

Responding to the R.N.C. directive, Sen. Ted Cruz (R-Texas) said that he understood Priebus’s concerns, but assured him that, at the end of the day, they were groundless. “Anyone who doesn’t think I’m capable of spewing an infinite stream of vitriol and bile doesn’t know what I’m made of,” he said, pointing with pride to his long record of hating President Obama.

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+88 # ER444 2015-04-24 14:53
Brilliant!!!
 
 
0 # A_Har 2015-04-28 07:03
Guess what, these manifestations are simply the front and center COMPETITION between the two parties relative to who gains ascendency in the next election to have a crack at screwing over ordinary people.

This is *NOT something to relish.*

THEY ARE ALL IN IT TOGETHER!
 
 
+42 # PeacefulGarden 2015-04-24 16:04
And they get paid a lot of money to spew hate about the next president from their bottomless hate tanks. Priebus might be correct, they need to hold back on spending money on hate just to ensure that they have enough money to pay for all of the hate. But, I think they have enough money -- or hate or money... Rich people hating other rich people. It is kinda fun to watch.
 
 
+70 # pappajohn15@Gmail.com 2015-04-24 16:43
.
I love this guy.
 
 
+74 # Gaz 2015-04-24 22:39
Rush Limbaugh spent eight years attacking Bill Clinton daily. He's spent another six attacking Barack Obama daily. Fox News has followed suit. Where has it got them? Two double-term Democratic presidents.

Mitch McConnell promised his constituents and the country that President Obama would be a one-term president. How'd that work out? Even with a completely hostile Republican Congress, President Obama continues to get things done.

It's clear that he drives them crazy: they even resort to sending letters to Iran's Supreme Leader, their sworn enemy.
How much more desperate can they get?

If we keep following Andy, we'll be right on top of the inevitable crack up.

Onward!
 
 
+45 # Rockster 2015-04-24 23:56
The thing about vitriol and hate is that it's ravenous and inevitably eats it's own babies. But Andy's way of showing this truth is much more fun!
 
 
+23 # John Puma 2015-04-25 03:06
Hatred for HRC from the GOP will not peak until Jan 20, 2021 or Jan 20, 2025.
 
 
+29 # ericlipps 2015-04-25 05:40
A year and a half? So far they've kept it up for 23 years, ever since Bill Clinton emerged as the front-runner for the Democratic presidential nomination waaaay back in 1992.
 
 
+10 # reiverpacific 2015-04-25 09:12
Well, it worked for the Nazis------!!!!
 
 
+12 # bmiluski 2015-04-25 09:50
And it worked during the dark ages when the church vilified ALL women and preached that only the rich were allowed an education.
 
 
+7 # JayaVII 2015-04-25 09:15
In a lucid moment Winston found that he was shouting with the others and kicking his heel violently against the rung of his chair. The horrible thing about the Two Minutes Hate was not that one was obliged to act a part, but, on the contrary, that it was impossible to avoid joining in. A hideous ecstasy of fear and vindictiveness, a desire to kill, to torture, to smash faces in with a sledge-hammer, seemed to flow through the whole group of people like an electric current, turning one even against one's will into a grimacing, screaming lunatic...
 
 
+4 # bmiluski 2015-04-25 09:50
OMG....how prophetic.
 
 
+8 # Kwamined 2015-04-25 09:32
Liberate America!
Lobotomize Republicans
 
 
+6 # bingers 2015-04-25 11:50
Quoting Kwamined:
Liberate America!
Lobotomize Republicans


Are you charging that that hasn't already happened? Could have fooled me when looking at their agenda.
 
 
+16 # fredboy 2015-04-25 11:06
No problem: The current GOP has an endless supply of hatred. It is what fuels the party.
 
 
-12 # jazzman633 2015-04-25 16:01
I am no Republican, but if America elects another lying, sleazoid, power-hungry, crony-capitalis t Clinton (because we HAVE to have a female President), you will see corruption and self-enrichment reach new heights. And expect more government -- lots more under President Clinton II (who once confessed to being a "policy junkie"). Or maybe she'll do nothing, as is consistent with her non-resume.
 
 
-2 # A_Har 2015-04-25 21:05
Your view on this posting doesn't seem to be popular. In this case the enemy of mine enemy is *NOT my friend.* I can't stand the power hungry corrupt warmongering harpy!

IMO this "celebration" has nothing to recommend it. I can't stand the Rethugs, but consider this:

Hillary Clinton Calls For ‘Toppling’ the 1%…While Being Bankrolled by the 1%

http://theantimedia.org/hillary-clinton-calls-for-toppling-the-1-while-being-bankrolled-by-the-1/

And this:

Exclusive: Clinton charities will refile tax returns, audit for other errors
"Hillary Clinton's family's charities are refiling at least five annual tax returns after a Reuters review found errors in how they reported donations from governments, and said they may audit other Clinton Foundation returns in case of other errors.
The foundation and its list of donors have been under intense scrutiny in recent weeks. Republican critics say the foundation makes Clinton, who is seeking the Democratic presidential nomination in 2016, vulnerable to undue influence. Her campaign team calls these claims "absurd conspiracy theories"

http://www.reuters.com/article/2015/04/23/us-usa-election-clinton-taxes-exclusive-idUSKBN0NE0CA20150423

Hillary is NO PRIZE as the nominee. She doesn't stand for you or me.
 
 
+1 # Buddha 2015-04-27 16:35
"“no human beings, even an impressive group like yourselves, could possibly sustain such a high intensity of throbbing hatred for an entire year and a half.”"

Benghazi? I've even heard them bringing back Whitewater. Never underestimate the ability of GOP to carry tinfoil hattery hatred for decades.
 
 
+2 # dquandle 2015-04-27 20:23
No worries. My hatred for Hillary can only increase with her burgeoning fascism. Its zooming towards infinity as I write this.
 

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