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writing for godot

Snowballs In Hell

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Written by Lori O.   
Wednesday, 09 November 2016 05:04

 

This is correspondent Lori Overholtzer reporting from Hell. I'm here in the section of Hell known as Razor's Edge Central Park. As you can see behind me, the scene here is not what one usually sees while roaming through this section of Satan's great Hotel.

Instead of the normal hot fires, oozing magma and hot jagged stones one would normally traverse while taking a stroll, we see piles and piles of snow.

Over there on the left, some of Satan's minions are busy making a snowman, while other inhabitants of Hell are running back and forth throwing snowballs.

What is the cause of this extremely abnormal weather in Hell?

I'm joined now by Satan himself, who will discuss with us his interpretation of what just could be causing this strange phenomenon.

"Hello Satan, it's good to see you, you are looking well."

"Thanks Lori." "This is the first time we've ever gotten the white stuff down here, and it is making it near impossible for me to create havoc for all the lost souls down here."

"What do you attribute all this snow too?" "Have you discerned the cause?"

"Well, Lori, my experts tell me that one Donald J. Trump was just elected U.S. President, and they say that it may be the cause."

"Really?" "That's fascinating!" "What evidence is there to support such an assumption?"

"The experts were told, and I quote, that 'Hell Would Freeze Over' before Donald Trump would win the U.S. election'; therefore, as you can see, that must truly be the cause of this new Winter Wonderland in Hell."

"It truly is a stunning event." "Thanks Satan for taking the time to talk with us today." "Thank you Lori."

"From Razor's Edge Central Park in Hell, this has been Lori Overholtzer" "Back to you, Chris"

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